No one craves rejection, and there’s a reason the phrase fear of rejection exists. Rejection can leave you asking a nagging list of questions, along with feelings of shame, anxiety, embarrassment, sadness, and even anger.
You can experience the stages of grief when you experience rejection and internalize it even when you know you shouldn’t (Why wasn’t I good enough? What’s wrong with me?).
While rejection is something everyone experiences, it can be particularly intense for those with a condition known as Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), which is linked to ADHD, or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. According to the Cleveland Clinic, experts suspect RSD is due to brain structure differences where you’re unable to regulate rejection-related feelings, intensifying the emotions.
RSD Symptoms
RSD is more than being sensitive. The intense emotions can cause significant distress, including symptoms like:
- Feeling embarrassed or self-conscious more easily
- Difficulty believing in themselves
- Low self-esteem
- Engaging in negative self-talk
- Being short tempered
- Lashing out in anger or crying outbursts to rejection-related emotions
- Snapping onsets of depression or moodiness
- People-pleasing tendencies
- Avoiding activities where there’s an opportunity to fail
- Striving for all-out perfectionism
- Defensiveness
- Thought rumination
Impact on Relationships
RSD can cause strain on interpersonal relationships. According to Psychology Today, a person may grow timid and afraid of sharing their real feelings, escalate conflicts with anger that feels out of proportion to the situation, and attempt to keep their partner on a tighter and tighter leash because they are terrified that their partner will leave them otherwise.
RSD Diagnosis
According to the Cleveland Clinic, RSD isn’t recognized as a medical condition, and much research remains to better understand its prevalence. As such, many providers may not diagnose RSD and mistake it for other conditions it can resemble at times, including:
- Bipolar disorder
- Borderline personality Disorder
- Social anxiety disorder
- Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
- Depression
Treating RSD
If you suspect you have RSD, it’s important to talk to a healthcare provider about your symptoms, take any medications that are part of your treatment plan, find a therapist to help you manage RSD behaviors, prioritize self-care, and be kinder to yourself.
Finding ways to cope and manage your overall stress level can help, so exercise, diet, and sleep play an important role. Learning to take time and process emotions before acting out in response.
It’s also important to understand the triggers, including:
- Real or perceived rejection and failure
- Teasing
- Criticism (including constructive)
While RSD on its own isn’t life-threatening, the symptoms — like depression and anxiety — can lead to overwhelming emotional pain and risks of self-harm. In these situations, the following resources can offer support:
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Dial 988)
- Local crisis lines in your area
- 911 if you or someone you know are in immediate danger of self-harm or suicide
Source:
https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24099-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-rsd
https://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/friendship-20/201907/what-is-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
https://psychcentral.com/adhd/what-is-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
https://www.verywellhealth.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-5224953
https://neurodivergentinsights.com/blog/how-to-deal-with-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria
https://www.npr.org/2023/11/03/1200586419/why-rejection-hurts-so-much-and-how-to-cope